Is there really a good reason regarding the traditional exercise of women marrying older men? If so, how much older?
That’s the essential query. If a woman marries a man 7 to 10 years older than her, can it be known as getting married to an “older man? In present day requirements, many women seem to develop such a view point. Getting married to a man, almost the same age or about 2 to 3 years elder seem to be an appropriate norm to the present day woman.
But individually, I have a very powerful view that for a good marital bond, an age distinction of about 4 to 8 years among the woman and man is really favorable and it works out amazing things in majority of the cases I have seen.
There are two things of compatibility in marital relationship. One is the physical maturity and second is the mental maturity.
Women obtain both physical and mental adulthood at much younger age than men. A girl child of three years has linguistic and oral interaction skills much more designed than a male child of same age. A girl child’s dependency on her mother at that age is far less than that of a boy. A girl child at that age attends per-school with much more ease and self assurance and desire than a boy child.
A girl attains adolescence at about 12 to 14 years where as a boy attains it at 14 to 17 years of age. A girl’s intuition about the opposite sex is much more designed at the teen age in comparison with boys.
Seeing the world and monitoring people, sense of liability towards one’s own life and that of those dependent on oneself, firming up of clear ideas about one’s needs and wants, goals and dreams etc are reasonably well developed in a woman at about 21 years; on the other hand, a man of similar age is far more boyish, care free, takes things too lightly and is afraid of getting into responsibilities and taking up responsibility. An unbridled, play-boy life looks to be far more eye-catching to a man at that age than one of commitment and responsibility of a marital relationship.
A level of emotional maturity towards a disciplined family life and the realization that love and passion of a caring wife is far more valuable than a physical store for lust comes to a man somewhere above the age of twenty six or so.
Thus when a woman marries a man 4 to 8 years elder to her, the mental maturity level between them fairly suits and they will be in a better place to adjust with each other.
All said and done, a basic psychological fact about man that cannot be wished away is his sense of brilliance over opposite sex. A man, deservedly or undeservedly expects that his wife should treat him as more than an equal partner and any sign of respect shown to him towards this sense of superiority is welcome by him. When a decent age difference exists, the woman tends to show him more respect than if he were to be of equal age to her. This psychological nuance helps in a significant way in bringing cordiality in relationship.
From physical adulthood point of view, this age distinction augurs well in the long run. A woman’s safe age of becoming a mother is up to 35 years and her active interest in sex gradually wanes consequently. A woman attains the menopause anywhere between her 45th to 50th ages. After the menopause, women practically lose interest in sex. On the other hand, a man’s sexually virile age may extend even up to his 60 years of age. Men at around their 40th of age tend to get an enhanced vigor in sexual cravings and a co-operative and a willing partner at home helps in avoiding them from going astray.
Further the young looks of a wife matters a lot to a man; But for a woman, the love of a man rather than the looks of a man is of primary importance. Normally, at about 40, a man of that age looks quite younger in comparison with his wife, if she were to be of same age group.
Perhaps, this is one of the main reasons why a wider age gap between man and woman for marital relationship was preferred in previous generations.