There are few things in life that are overall, but trust between two people is one of them. You can’t sort of believe in someone. You either do or you don’t. It’s fairly simple.
Based on the stakes, people can be actually careless with little things that might cause harm to trust. I had one client who would lie to her husband about how much she invested at the shopping mall. She wasn’t lying about that much. She’d just fudge the figures a little bit. She’d say she spend $200 when she’d actually spent $275.00. Actually she’d only done it a few times, more than once, but not regularly. When he found out he assumed she was lying about other factors. He tore their relationship apart trying to figure out what about. She held responsible him for their problems when she started it over $75.00.
I had another client who had a shared Facebook account with his wife. They’d agreed on performing it that way. Before his 15th high school reunion, he started a private one. He did have a idea of using it communicates with his high school girlfriend. He didn’t intend to cheat on his wife, but he knew she wouldn’t enjoy him conveyed with a high school flame. He did neither actually, cheat with or communicate with his ex. A couple of his old football buddies friended him on Facebook, and recommended the pictures he’d posted at the reunion, in front of his wife, who had the heart sinking emotion he was hiding something from her and of course he was, anything small, but she couldn’t see it that way. If it was so simple why did he hide it? It ate her up.
The problem is trust is never a given. It’s earned, and it’s much tougher to repair once broken than it was to build in the first place. Even the little things can do harm that can be irreparable, because trust is so fragile, and absolute. A relationship without having trust is divisive and corrosive on many levels and love has a hard time increasing there.
So, if you’re going to be in a relationship keeping in mind, trust is absolute. It is or it isn’t. Anything less than real trust and loyalty creates shadows around the love that you want to create. (Tweetable) Before you risk it, carelessly or deliberately ask yourself if it’s worth the cost. If you want to stay together I can almost guarantee it’s not.